How to Stick to Your Wellness Goals and Make Self-Care a Lasting Habit

By Guest Blogger Zack Spring

Photo by Moe Magners on Pexels.com

Busy professionals, caregivers, and adults seeking holistic wellness often start strong with self-care, then watch routines fade when stress spikes and calendars fill. The core tension is simple: the body still needs support for chronic pain and overwhelm, but self-care consistency challenges make wellness goal struggles feel like a personal failure. For therapeutic massage beginners and anyone exploring holistic health for beginners, it can be hard to know what counts as “enough,” especially when stress relief techniques get skipped on the toughest days. With the right structure and expectations, wellness can become steadier and more realistic.

Quick Summary: Staying on Track with Self-Care

  • Set clear wellness goals so you know exactly what you are working toward.
  • Build a realistic self-care routine that fits your daily life and energy.
  • Protect time for wellness with simple time management and scheduling habits.
  • Track progress regularly to spot what helps, adjust quickly, and stay encouraged.
  • Use accountability and motivation techniques to keep momentum when willpower dips.

Build a Simple Self-Care Plan You’ll Follow This Week

This quick process helps you choose wellness goals that fit your body, schedule, and support needs, then turn them into a plan you can actually do this week. It matters because accessible self-care often works best when you pair gentle daily habits with occasional therapeutic massage and other holistic support.

  1. Choose one “why” and two focus areas
    Start by naming what you want self-care to protect or improve (pain relief, stress steadiness, better sleep, more energy). The idea to understand your why keeps goals personal, which makes them easier to return to on hard days. Then pick just two areas for this week: movement, nutrition, stress, sleep, or beginner yoga or meditation.
  2. Set tiny targets you can repeat
    Turn each focus area into a “minimum doable” action, like a 10 minute walk, one balanced snack, 3 minutes of breathing, or a short beginner yoga video. Make your target so realistic you could do it on a low-energy day. For sleep goals, aim for 7-9 hours as a north star, then choose one simple sleep-support habit for this week.
  3. Block time and reduce friction
    Put your actions on your calendar in specific time slots, even if they are only 5 to 15 minutes. Tie each habit to something you already do (after coffee, after work, after brushing teeth) so it feels automatic. Prep one small support in advance, like filling a water bottle, setting out a yoga mat, or placing a reminder note where you will see it.
  4. Add one supportive reset tool
    Pick one “backup option” for days when life happens: a 2 minute stretch, a short body scan, or a quick walk to the mailbox. If therapeutic massage is part of your care, schedule it as a recovery anchor and treat your daily habits as the bridge between sessions. This keeps you connected to progress without needing perfect consistency.
  5. Review in two minutes and adjust
    At the end of the week, ask: What felt easier than expected, and what felt unrealistic? Keep what worked, shrink what did not, and choose the next week’s two focus areas based on what your body is asking for. Consistency comes from adapting your plan, not judging yourself.

Habits That Make Self-Care Stick

These small practices turn wellness intentions into automatic cues, even during stressful weeks. They also pair well with accessible therapeutic massage and holistic supports, like those offered by Nani Lotus Bodywork, by helping your body stay regulated between appointments.

Two-Minute Body Check-In
  • What it is: Pause, scan jaw, shoulders, belly, and rate tension 1 to 10.
  • How often: Daily, midday.
  • Why it helps: You catch stress early and choose gentler actions before symptoms spike.
Same-Place Habit Tracking
  • What it is: Mark one checkbox on a sticky note, calendar, or phone reminder.
  • How often: Daily.
  • Why it helps: Visual streaks build momentum without demanding perfect results.
Movement Snack After Sitting
  • What it is: Do 3 to 5 minutes of walking, stretching, or stairs.
  • How often: Once per long sitting block.
  • Why it helps: Habit formation interventions can strengthen activity habits through simple, repeated cues.
Massage as a Monthly Recovery Anchor
  • What it is: Schedule one session, like with Nani Lotus Bodywork, and note two self-care supports for afterward.
  • How often: Monthly or every 3 to 6 weeks.
  • Why it helps: A planned reset reduces pain flare-ups and keeps your routines realistic.
If-Then Plan for Low-Energy Days
  • What it is: Write one fallback like “If tired, I will stretch for two minutes.”
  • How often: Weekly refresh.
  • Why it helps: You stay consistent by shrinking the task instead of quitting.

Common Self-Care Questions, Answered

Q: How can I choose wellness and self-care goals that fit my lifestyle and needs?
A: Start by picking one outcome you want most, like better sleep, less tension, or calmer focus. Then choose the smallest action that supports it, such as a weekly massage appointment, a 10 minute walk, or a nightly stretch. If it feels hard to choose, a quick wellness self-assessment can help you prioritize without guessing.

Q: What are effective ways to stay motivated and positive when I struggle to meet my wellness goals?
A: Treat missed days as data, not failure, and restart with a smaller version you can do in two minutes. It also helps to pair body-based care with mindset support because combined exercise-psychological interventions show strong benefits for mental health. Ask, “What would make this easier today?” then do that.

Q: How can I track my progress with self-care practices without feeling overwhelmed?
A: Track one metric only, either minutes, days practiced, or a simple stress rating from 1 to 10. Use a single location, like one note app or one calendar, and review weekly, not hourly. If tracking makes you anxious, switch to “did I show up at all?” as the win.

Q: What strategies help me make consistent time for self-care despite a busy schedule?
A: Time-block your non-negotiables first, such as sleep, meals, and one recovery practice, then fit everything else around them. Protect two small windows per week, even 15 minutes, and treat them like appointments. If your day collapses, do a micro-version and keep the streak alive.

Q: What options do I have if I want to shift my current lifestyle for better balance and am seeking flexible ways to learn new skills and create structure?
A: Start by mapping your week into fixed commitments and flexible hours so you can see realistic openings for change. Then compare flexible, accredited online programs that can fit around your wellness time-blocks, including MBA education programs, especially if you are balancing work, family, or a study schedule. Choose structure that supports your nervous system, not structure that drains it.

Build Sustainable Self-Care Habits That Support Long-Term Wellness

When life gets busy, it’s easy for wellness plans to slide, then missed weeks can turn into guilt and a restart cycle. The steadier approach is the one practiced here: simple routines, flexible expectations, and self-compassion that keeps resilience in wellness goals intact. Over time, that mindset supports long-term wellness persistence, positive mindset cultivation, and holistic health maintenance, without needing perfection to make progress. Consistency grows from small choices repeated with kindness. Choose one next step today: time-block one non-negotiable self-care appointment and treat it like any other commitment. That’s how sustainable self-care habits become the steady foundation for an encouragement-filled wellness journey and a stronger, more stable life.

Zack Spring works as a tech consultant, which requires him to travel frequently. He also enjoys running and cycling, staying as active as possible. He created TravelFit.info to encourage his readers to stay active while traveling.

No A.I. was used in crafting this article.

Small Moves, Better Days: Practical Ways to Support Daily Health

Image: Pexels

By Guest Blogger Bella Reilly

Everyday well-being isn’t built on grand overhauls; it grows from steady, repeatable choices that fit naturally into real life. When routines feel manageable, they’re more likely to stick—and that’s where meaningful change begins. The ideas below focus on simple strategies that quietly improve how you feel, think, and function day to day.

Quick Takeaways 

  • Small habits compound faster than occasional big efforts.
  • Movement, rest, and mental engagement work best when they’re consistent.
  • Organization reduces stress just as much as nutrition or exercise.
  • Learning and self-care can be practical, not indulgent.
  • Support systems and tools make healthy choices easier to maintain.

Gentle Habits That Anchor the Day

Daily well-being often hinges on rhythm. Waking up at roughly the same time, getting a few minutes of natural light, and eating regular meals help stabilize energy and mood. Hydration is another quiet lever; keeping a water bottle nearby tends to improve focus and reduce afternoon fatigue. These habits aren’t flashy, but they form the baseline that allows everything else to work better.

Keeping Health Information Organized and Accessible

Managing your health is easier when important documents aren’t scattered or forgotten. Digitizing records like lab results, prescriptions, and visit summaries allows quick reference during appointments or unexpected situations. Having a single, tidy digital folder often reduces anxiety because you know exactly where to look. Saving these files as PDFs helps preserve formatting and makes them easy to share across devices. Using tools for adding, reordering, deleting, or rotating pages keeps everything current without starting over. Learn more about guidelines for inserting pages into a PDF.

Moving the Body Without Making It a Chore

Movement doesn’t require a gym membership or a perfect plan. Walking during phone calls, stretching while waiting for coffee, or doing a brief mobility routine before bed all count. The goal is circulation and joint health, not exhaustion. Over time, these low-effort choices reduce stiffness, support cardiovascular health, and make more demanding activities feel less intimidating.

Learning as a Form of Mental Self-Care

Mental well-being thrives on curiosity and growth. Lifelong learning keeps the mind engaged, builds confidence, and creates a sense of forward motion that counters stagnation. Choosing a program aligned with your goals matters; for instance, someone focused on leadership or operations might explore bachelor in business administration programs to strengthen skills across accounting, communication, and management. Online degree options make this accessible, allowing learning to fit around work, family, and existing routines. 

Making Healthy Choices Stick

Consistency improves when decisions are made ahead of time and kept simple.

  • Choose one habit to focus on for two weeks.
  • Attach it to an existing routine, like mornings or evenings.
  • Keep the effort level intentionally low.
  • Track completion with a quick note or calendar check.
  • Adjust only after the habit feels automatic.

Comparing Everyday Wellness Supports

Different strategies serve different needs, and variety keeps routines flexible.

Focus AreaSimple ApproachEveryday Benefit
Physical energyShort walks or light stretchingBetter circulation and mood
Mental clarityLearning something new weeklyImproved confidence and focus
Stress reductionOrganized health informationLess anxiety during appointments
RecoveryBody-based relaxation practicesImproved sleep and calm

Integrating Bodywork Into Everyday Wellness

Stress often settles in the body before the mind notices it. Holistic services from Nani Lotus Bodywork, including therapeutic massage, reflexology, and Reiki, offer accessible ways to release tension and restore balance. These approaches support relaxation, circulation, and a sense of groundedness that complements everyday habits like movement and sleep. Exploring offerings from Nani Lotus Bodywork can help create a routine that nurtures both physical comfort and mental ease.

Practical Questions About Everyday Wellness Choices

If you’re weighing which steps to prioritize, these questions often come up when people move from interest to action.

How quickly can small health changes make a difference?
Some effects, like improved mood or energy, appear within days of consistent habits. Physical changes usually take longer, but momentum builds early. The key is noticing subtle improvements and letting them reinforce the routine.

Is it better to change multiple habits at once or one at a time?
Focusing on one habit at a time tends to work better for long-term consistency. Once it feels automatic, adding another becomes easier. This approach reduces overwhelm and decision fatigue.

Do digital tools really help with stress and health management?
Yes, especially when they reduce uncertainty. Having records and plans organized lowers cognitive load during already stressful moments. That mental relief often translates into better overall well-being.

How does learning impact mental health beyond career benefits?
Learning stimulates curiosity and provides a sense of progress. It can improve self-efficacy and reduce feelings of stagnation. These psychological benefits extend well beyond professional outcomes.

Are body-based therapies useful if I already exercise and eat well?
They complement those habits by supporting recovery and relaxation. Exercise builds strength, while bodywork helps release accumulated tension. Together, they create a more balanced approach to wellness.

Closing Thoughts

Everyday health is less about perfection and more about alignment. When habits fit your life, they become sustainable rather than stressful. By combining simple routines, organized information, ongoing learning, and intentional self-care, well-being becomes something you live—not something you chase. Small moves, repeated daily, quietly shape better days.

Bella Reilly knows the wellness struggle. For years she bounced from fad diet to trendy wellness treatment, back and forth and back and forth, leaving both her and her bank account feeling depleted. Eventually, she had to say, enough is enough. She began carefully researching wellness trends to find the best, most affordable options for her. At Well Now Shop, she shares some of the tips and advice she has gathered from her ongoing wellness research

No A.I. was used in crafting this article.

Uncommon Paths to Mental Wellness: Fresh Approaches That Just Might Work

Image by Freepik

By Guest Blogger Bella Reilly

Your mind’s a crowded room—too many voices, too many lists, and not enough air. You’ve tried the usual: meditation, therapy, the old “breathe in, breathe out” routine. All good, sure, but sometimes what you need is something stranger, softer, less clinical. Mental health doesn’t always have to live in the sterile lanes of prescriptions and generic advice. It’s about shifting energy in ways that feel alive, not prescriptive. Let’s get into seven unexpected, effective ways to shake up your mental landscape—and maybe even have a little fun with it.

Soak in the forest
There’s a reason the Japanese have a word for it: Shinrin-yoku. The literal translation—forest bathing—sounds gentle, but the effects go deep. Trees talk chemically. They release phytoncides that help reduce blood pressure, anxiety, even cortisol spikes. A slow walk in the woods becomes therapy when done with intention, no phone, no earbuds. According to research on forest bathing benefits, this immersive nature experience correlates with lower stress hormone levels and improved mood. You don’t need a cabin—just pick a patch of green and surrender to the quiet.

Move like no one’s watching
This isn’t about choreography. It’s about shaking off the static in your bones with a playlist that knows what your head needs before you do. Dancing taps into primitive systems, bypassing thought to let movement speak for emotion. You sweat. You breathe. You forget what was bothering you. There’s real science behind the mental benefits of dance, from endorphin surges to enhanced cognitive flexibility. Whether it’s two minutes in your kitchen or an hour in a studio, your brain thanks you.

Try these four safe alternatives
You’ve got options that live outside the pharmacy and inside your pantry, your backyard, your vape cart. These alternatives won’t solve every problem, but they might soften the edges. Let’s run through four you may not have tried:

  • Chamomile tea: not just sleepytime fluff; it may affect GABA receptors in your brain, gently easing anxiety.
  • Magnesium glycinate: helps your muscles relax and may lower anxiety by regulating the HPA axis.
  • Ashwagandha: an adaptogen that’s been shown to assist in lowering cortisol and boosting calm in those with chronic stress; ashwagandha stress relief is backed by growing research.
  • THCa diamonds concentrate: non-psychoactive and potentially anti-inflammatory, THCa stress benefits are starting to gain attention for offering calming effects without a high.

Journal in chaos, not structure
Everyone says journal, but no one talks about how rigid those prompts feel. Forget the gratitude lists for a second. Try writing without punctuation, without order, without rereading. Let it all out—misspellings, ramblings, ugly thoughts, weird loops. You aren’t crafting a memoir, you’re unloading static. Studies suggest journaling for mental health can clear intrusive thoughts, regulate emotion, and create patterns of insight—but only when it’s honest and messy enough to matter.

Hack your bedtime like a ritual
The modern adult glorifies exhaustion. You’re not weak, you’re just tired in eight directions. But a sleep ritual—a real one, not scrolling TikTok under the sheets—can change your mental baseline. Tea, dim lights, a podcast that bores you in just the right way. Same time every night, even on weekends. The trick is consistency, and bedtime routine tips from sleep experts suggest this predictability signals your brain to wind down more efficiently. You’re building trust with your own circadian rhythm.

Play with the cold
Cold showers aren’t punishment—they’re recalibration. That jolt you feel is your nervous system getting a clean slap across the face, and weirdly, it helps. Ice baths, cryotherapy, or a minute under freezing water can increase norepinephrine, the brain’s natural mood booster. It’s brutal at first, but kind in the long run. Athletes use it for recovery, but for the anxious mind, it creates a strange sort of peace. Curious about cold exposure benefits? It’s more than grit—it’s a tool for emotional reset.

Tune into the invisible
Sometimes healing isn’t loud. It’s quiet palms hovering over tense shoulders, or a breath held for just one second longer than usual. Reiki isn’t about pressure or belief—it’s about permission. Your nervous system responds to intention whether you buy into the whole energy-field thing or not. Meditation works the same way; when done consistently, it changes how your brain handles stress, and Reiki and meditation practices have been linked to lower anxiety and improved emotional clarity. You don’t have to understand it fully to benefit—you just have to show up and sit still.

You don’t have to be perfect. You don’t even have to be okay all the time. What you do need is movement, novelty, a few weird habits that make the day feel a little less heavy. Mental health isn’t one path. It’s a crowded, messy trail of strange experiments and little joys. Start with one of these—walk a forest, take a cold shower, scribble until your hand hurts—and see where it takes you. The next best version of you might just be on the other side of something unusual.

Embrace the divine feminine and rejuvenate your spirit with Nani Lotus Bodywork, where heart-centered services and holistic therapies await to support your journey in love and light.

Bella Reilly knows the wellness struggle. For years she bounced from fad diet to trendy wellness treatment, back and forth and back and forth, leaving both her and her bank account feeling depleted. Eventually, she had to say, enough is enough. She began carefully researching wellness trends to find the best, most affordable options for her. At Well Now Shop, she shares some of the tips and advice she has gathered from her ongoing wellness research

No A.I. was used in crafting this article.

Beating the Burnout: How Women Can Redesign the Grind and Reclaim Their Well-Being

Image via Freepik

By Guest Blogger Zack Spring

The pace at which modern life demands you operate isn’t just fast—it’s exhausting in a way that feels almost personal. And if you’re a woman, chances are you’re juggling invisible labor on top of the visible: careers, caretaking, social expectations, and the ever-churning pressure to optimize every corner of your life. You wake up already feeling behind, and somehow bedtime rolls around with a to-do list that grew rather than shrank. It’s not sustainable. But here’s the thing: you’re not broken, the system is. And while you can’t completely escape the grind, you can learn how to outsmart it. You can recalibrate your routine and your mindset to protect your energy, your joy, and your well-being.

Start With the Non-Negotiables

Before you add anything new, you have to be ruthless about what stays. This means taking an honest look at your daily routine and identifying what’s truly essential versus what’s simply habitual. Are you really obligated to respond to every email within five minutes, or is that just your anxiety running the show? Simplifying doesn’t mean doing less—it means doing what actually matters more often. You reclaim time not by chasing it, but by choosing what you’ll let go of.

Redesign Your Mornings With Intention

The way you begin your day bleeds into everything that follows. If your mornings are chaotic, rushed, or purely reactive, your whole day tends to spiral in that same energy. Instead, claim the first 15 minutes for yourself—no screens, no emails, just something grounding. That might mean a cup of tea in silence, a quick journaling session, or stretching your limbs while the coffee brews. This tiny window, carved out just for you, becomes a signal to your nervous system that you’re running the day—not the other way around.

Reframe Work as a Source of Fulfillment

When you’re staring down the same uninspiring workweek, it’s easy to forget that a job can actually feed your spirit—not just your bank account. Finding something more rewarding starts with understanding what makes you feel engaged, respected, and challenged in a way that energizes rather than drains you. Once you’ve got that clarity, updating your resume becomes less of a chore and more of an act of self-advocacy. Saving your resume as a PDF offers benefits like maintaining formatting across devices, having compatibility with different operating systems, and easy sharing and storing of files. Using a PDF maker allows you to create or convert any document into a PDF so your application always looks exactly how you intended (this deserves a look).

Say Yes to Saying No

A lot of burnout stems not from doing too much, but from doing too much of what you didn’t want to say yes to in the first place. Boundaries aren’t walls; they’re bridges that lead you back to yourself. When you say no—without guilt, without long-winded excuses—you’re actually saying yes to your own needs, your own peace. That can feel radical, especially if you’ve been taught to equate kindness with self-sacrifice. But protecting your energy is not selfish; it’s strategic.

Movement That Feels Like Medicine

Exercise doesn’t have to look like a HIIT class or a 5K run. If you dread it, it’s not helping you. Reclaim movement as a way to feel alive in your body, not as a punishment for existing in it. That could mean dancing in your kitchen, going on long neighborhood walks with music that makes you feel invincible, or stretching out on your living room floor until the tension starts to melt. When movement stops being performative and starts being nourishing, your body remembers how to thank you.

The Radical Act of Doing Nothing

There’s nothing more countercultural right now than rest. Not scrolling. Not multitasking while watching a show. Actual, honest-to-goodness stillness. Even ten minutes of lying on the couch staring at the ceiling can feel like a mini rebellion against hustle culture. And it’s in those pauses—those quiet, empty spaces—that your nervous system finally exhales. Give yourself permission to do nothing. You don’t need to earn rest. You’re already enough.

Try Something Outside the Usual Box

Sometimes your body and spirit need something you can’t quite articulate—something deeper than just sleep or vacation. That’s where holistic therapies come in. If you’re like many others who side-eye anything that sounds like “energy work” or “intuitive touch,” you haven’t tried Nani Lotus Bodywork. They offer an approach that blends therapeutic massage with spiritual grounding techniques, and it can feel like someone finally addressing both the knots in your shoulders and the ones in your psyche. If you’re feeling frayed at the edges, it’s worth exploring. 

Surround Yourself With Unpolished Conversations

You don’t need more #inspo posts. You need conversations that go past the highlight reel and get into the mess—people who’ll talk about the times they almost gave up, the days they didn’t get out of bed, the realness behind the filtered selfies. Community isn’t just about support; it’s about truth. And when you hear someone else name the thing you’ve been carrying in silence, it opens a kind of door inside you. That kind of connection isn’t flashy, but it’s where real resilience begins.

The world isn’t going to slow down for you. But that doesn’t mean you have to keep burning out just to keep up. You get to create a life where your well-being isn’t a luxury but a given—where taking care of yourself isn’t squeezed in at the end of the day, but baked into the rhythm of your life. It takes intention. It takes unlearning. And sometimes it takes surprising detours—like stumbling into a hidden holistic bodywork studio or learning how to sit with stillness. But once you begin, you start to realize: the grind doesn’t get to decide how you live. You do.

Discover the path to balance and wellness with Nani Lotus Bodywork, where heart-centered services and holistic therapies await to rejuvenate your mind, body, and spirit.

Zack Spring works as a tech consultant, which requires him to travel frequently. He also enjoys running and cycling, staying as active as possible. He created TravelFit.info to encourage his readers to stay active while traveling.

No A.I. was used in crafting this article.

Regarding Sexual Predators, Inappropriate Conduct, and Massage Therapy

This is going to be a long one, so make sure you have proper time to dive in. And it’s not-so-swell.

I probably should have started advocating for this with my writing a long time ago. It’s not like me not talking about this is making it go away.

I mean, just last year, the guy I pawned off on others contacted me six months later and again requested my services. Why? He liked my “vibe”. Dude… I wouldn’t work with you before, I’m not going to now, either. His job? Professional boudoir photographer who likes to empower women.

As if.

PLEASE NOTE! THIS POST IS GRAPHIC AND MAY INDUCE ANXIETY AND PTSD SO READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

There once was this young military kid who made references to his time in Asia on more than one occasion. We’d laugh about it, I’d remind him that ‘we don’t do that here’, and we’d move on. Oddly enough, we were both seemingly genuine in our goodbyes when he was shipped off to a new location. (Thank God, though, right?)

Or how about the guy who (sweetly) brought the entire studio coffee because he thought he and I were “friends” after a handful of sessions? I made sure to make mention of my boyfriend (now husband) at the time. Sorry! Not available!

Or the guy who kept claiming he was hot and needed his sheet a different way. I think this guy was a cop. I told him he had to stay draped. (Policy’s policy.)

How about the jerk who recently texted late at night and asked if I did Karsai. I had to look it up–not amused. I told him to seek a medical doc and if he ever contacted me or my affiliates again, we’d consider it harassment. (I naturally told him a medical doc because clearly he needed a shrink.)

Wow, I just had another memory kick in! A dude who blared his own music during his massage! Stupid me was like, ‘sure, of course you can play your own music’. This jerk made more than one reference to massaging the inside of his leg. I let him know he should probably seek clinical care if he needed help on that part of his muscle. Sometime in the future, he was again in the studio and I immediately made myself scarce. Someone else booked him another massage with me. I magically became unavailable for that booked massage and had to cancel it.

He did not rebook with anyone else.

Jeez. How many times have things been inappropriate that I don’t remember? And why the hell is this a part of my job?

Here’s the latest doozy! The asshat I banned in 2020 is back! WTF!

Here’s how I see it:

This particular prick groomed me. I was always leery around him, but I’m a professional and kept him as a client for over a year. Over a year! Looking back, at the time of the infraction, he had stopped talking about his wife and kids. I swear one time I saw him check out my ass. During the pandemic, he even reached out to my Facebook account and asked if I would massage him at his house. I reminded him that that was highly illegal at that point; no freaking way. (No way, anyway!) He would email my business account, too.

Right before the infraction I regrettably had offered some personal information that I was about to get married–this was only to imply that I would be out of town for awhile, so if he wanted an appointment sometime before then, he should go ahead and make one. Rereading old emails, he did offer me an early congratulations, and said he’d like to see me one more time but if he couldn’t, he understood, and he wished me the best.

I was literally just telling him I’d be out of town for awhile. Holy crap — this was his response: I guess I didn’t know how to take it at 1st. I would love to continue to see you! You’re the best massage therapist I’ve ever had! So I’ll book for Saturday & hope it works out. He later went on to say he really needed it, and my dumbass told him to take a rest if he was working out too much! (Guess he had been telling me about his manly weightlifting. Eye roll.)

OH! This is so freaking infuriating!!!

So the day of the infraction: I took him into a room he’d never been in before because we had another therapist working at the time. This room is a beautiful room with lit salt panels on the walls, any color of your choosing.

My guess is he took it as special for him, not special in general. (It’s a damn lovely space.)

He clearly missed the point that the other massage room was in use, so we needed somewhere else to go!

WARNING! WARNING! ABOUT TO GET GROSS AF!

At any rate, I was in denial about what was going on. He was often ticklish. He often adjusted himself while lying prone. He often “responded” that way when he was supine. In school, we are taught that this is normal and there’s no reason to shame a man for “relaxing”, right? Maybe it shouldn’t be normalized. Maybe that’s more patriarchal bullshit.

And so this particular day he adjusted himself for quite a bit, so long that I almost said something to him about it. I turned away from his lower half to continue working on his back, jabbing into the QL muscle, into his traps, trying to come up a with a solution to make. it. stop! Before I could enact any sort of plan, though, his apparent need to stop “readjusting” must have kicked in.

So I convinced myself that it had never happened.

Even so, when I discovered disgusting wet sheets upon his departure, I was floored. FLOORED!

Is that really what happened? What the hell was this guy’s problem?

It is still etched into my memory how another person in the studio asked about his massage while the predator was waiting to pay. I can see his smile, the acknowledgment of another great massage from me. The God Blasted NERVE.

I was freaking weak afterwards, calling my now-husband in disbelief. I contacted the studio owner and she graciously let me ban the psycho in my own way, which was an email:

Dear (Name):
In lieu of what happened during or after your massage session on Saturday, October 3, 2020 at 10:45AM, our therapeutic and professional relationship has ended. This isn’t the first time I’ve suspected something, and while I’m not sure if your actions on the table and subsequent wet sheets left behind on Saturday were nefarious on your part, it doesn’t matter; this is a clear violation of the client / licensed massage therapist professional relationship, and trust is now broken as ethical boundaries on your part have been crossed. I am a professional through and through, and this behavior insults my intelligence and the profession at large. The owner of the studio is being CCed on this email. The other therapists who work at the studio also know what happened. This event is well-documented. There is no need for a response, and this email effectively ends all future communication with me, and all future communication with everyone affiliated with (Name of Studio)

Look at me trying to give him the benefit of the doubt. Aren’t I kind?

Rereading through old emails, he also had apparently asked at some point to start facing upwards because he really wanted his back to be the last part to be massaged. Translation, I’m a pervert?

Those last emails between us, I can clearly see a pattern of me still working with him, but also trying to break away. Maybe he knew it.

But anyway, on April 18, 2024, he deign call the studio asking for me to return his call to schedule a massage. Are you kidding me? This is over three and a half years later!

The studio texted me and said to give this guy a call to book an appointment. Naturally, the person who took the call knew nothing about all of this, but guess what? Everyone should now! I was very graphic about why the situation with this jackass needed to be brought up to the studio owner. His number has been blocked, his account is flagged, he cannot book appointments on his own.

I contacted a local place for legal advice and was informed that I should file a police report. I spoke with non-emergency and dispatch and it seems like everyone is heavily encouraging me to file a restraining order, which I might just do that, even if he doesn’t reach out again. Any which way, I filed the police report and it’s in writing and documented that he has reached out to me via the studio after being banned almost four years ago.

What can we do to help STOP this shit?

As a massage therapist, I have the damn right to do my job safely and effectively without repercussions. We are professionals. We are in healthcare. A lot of us are licensed. We train in human anatomy, human psyche and ethics. We help with pain management, increased mobility and a million other things. I personally do energy work as well.

In our training, we need to be given phone numbers to call if something happens. We need local massage advocate groups. We need law enforcement’s positive support in addition to PD hunting down human traffickers and illegitimate studios. We need the healthcare industry to finally acknowledge us as a part of preventative and reactive care. Health insurances need to cover massage, just like most cover chiropractic.

We have to speak out about this shit. We need to speak out about our experiences and share them. We need to blast our friends and family who make inappropriate comments. We need to blast Hollywood and the general media anytime they depict us in the wrong light.

I’m not one for censorship, but enough is enough. Just look at the bullshit I’ve had to endure in almost fifteen years of practice–and this is just what I recall off of the top of my head!

Until advocates and their family and friends speak up to help fix this (not cure it, fix it), this abuse will stay the same. This is NOT OKAY.

It is not too big to change. I don’t care how it was in the past. This is literally how change happens! Start today. If you mention this post, I guarantee someone you know will make an off-color remark.

It is your job to correct them. Help me out, help your sister, your wife, your aunt Sarah, help your own therapist.

Trust me, no massage therapist wants to be put in these situations. Nobody wants to feel unsafe in their chosen profession.

We just want to help people.

And if the asshat who just called me happens to be reading this — stay the hell away.

Actually, all of you asshats out there. Stay the hell away.

RESOURCES: ABMP * Respect Massage * Sexual Assault Hotline